dilluns, 15 de maig de 2017

Day 16: Are you slow?

Yesterday I was chatting with the workers of the restaurant next to ours and one guy asked me, are you a bit slow? And I said, no. And he said he's seen me a bit slow but I explained that it was because there was not a lot of work at the particular moment he saw me.

This guy unknowingly was challenging a point I had walked in self forgiveness where I was working at a slow pace to 'preserve energy' but now I changed it to go 'full on' as the body does not need to hold back and can simply go for it and be rejuvenated in doing physical activity.

This guy then said 'oh I had a bad preconceived idea about you' and talked to the others if they could hire me - lol - as they have a lot of work.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to work slowly to preserve energy instead of seeing, realizing and understanding that the physical body is cool with going for it and doing physical activities, not holding back or preserving the body as it is not how it works.

You can read more about preserving energy not being necessary but unadvised where I learnt about it in the blog post by Leila Zamora Moreno 'Conserving Energy is Exhausting'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am doing myself and my body a favour by working in a 'chill out manner' not seeing that I was being incompetent in my job and feeding my mind instead of being here in my body working the best I can.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to be here in my physical body doing the physical activities as efficient and fast as I can within common sense.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to unlock my potential as what I can do with my physical body as physical work within the belief that I have to preserve energy of my body.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand that what I do at work of applying myself to do my best with my physical body, I can also do outside of work.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear others calling me slow as the bad consequences it can have ultimately being fired from my job if this persists.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go fast at my job in fear they will find me slow and fire me, instead of going fast as an expression of me of being fast and efficient.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and  understand that whenever I try to preserve energy I am making myself more dull and whenever I don't try to preserve energy I am more rejuvenated.

I commit myself to remind myself to not try to preserve energy and 'going for it' at the job as it is the best I can do for me and the job.

Whenever I see I am moving in fear of being fired, I stop and I breathe. I realize that I don't need fear to spear me to go fast but that I can simply apply myself to move efficiently and fast as an expression of me.

I commit myself to check whenever I am going fast if there is a fear that they will fire me if I go slower, to remove the fear and then continue going at the pace that it is best, not faster in fear but the right pace that is best for the job.

I commit myself to remind myself to slow down within going fast whenever I see that I am going too fast that I can create negative consequences such as breaking plates or injuring myself.

I commit myself to move at work within common sense and self-responsibility, going faster where I can and being patient where I have to.

Whenever I see that I fear others judging me as slow, I stop and I breathe. I realize that they might have seen me when there was no much work, and that I have to always take self-responsibility and see for myself where I can improve, and explain whenever I am being called slow if it is not so.

I commit myself to stand up for myself and communicate whenever I am being treated or judged unfairly.

Whenever I think that by going slow I am preserving energy, I stop and I breathe. I realize that I rest at sleep and during the day I can go and apply myself physically without holding back as the body can handle physical activity better than I think it can.







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